Stick with me for a moment on this comment please. I have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue, and I can share more than the events listed above when I am busy throwing myself a pity party from the comfort of my sheets donned in my warmest and softest pajamas. What I would like to suggest today, is that I feel the message of “why me” of suffering has become a tremendous self-delusion that I create for myself while throwing this pity party.
Every toss and turn in the bed at 3 am is a reminder of the pain in a right hip or left neck area. Turning to lift a bag from the back of the car after buying groceries is a throbbing in the shoulder blades. Drinking the second cup of warm caffenated coffee is a normal routine each morning, but today this ritual finds my eyes needing to close again for another two to three hours for just a little more rest. The effort involved in getting dressed for a trip to the grocery or a coffee date with an old friend can oftentimes be more than one can bear. This suffering is what has you asking yourself what has happened that you deserve this level of pain. Honestly, this statement is what I like to call the tremendous self-deluded “Why Me” of Suffering.
The Tremendous Self-deluded “Why Me” Moments of Suffering
If you are a Fibro Warrior/Fatigue Faithful then you know the discussion you have in your head (and dare I say with your family), that you do not deserve to suffer this much pain and doctors/people should help you. What if today, we take a minute to look at our suffering and pain from another point of view? What if today we stop the tremendous self-deluded “why me” of suffering.
Is the “why me” statement really self-deluded
When we begin to throw our own pity party with our “why me” in all the issues we feel with our fibro and fatigue, I wonder if we take a moment to think about all the others in our world or own small rehelm of influence. Are we really the “only” sufferers? Is what is happening in our bodies because of something we have done or what has been done to us? I would like to suggest that we often feel this self-deluded feeling of being the only sufferer because the pain is so great in our situations. Our great pain and fatigue often give us the delusion that feeling is all there is to our world. It consumes our feelings and thoughts so that we can not see out beyond our very own circumstances.
The truth of the matter
In my resent reflection on this aspect in my very own Pain Pity Party (PPP), I found that my consuming thoughts of “why me” were just that- a self-delusion. I am not the only one suffering great pain, or bad things. Now I know that we as fibro-warriors know this in our right minds or our good days. On those PPP days though, we are caught up planning, participating and just partying up in own own self-pity of “why me”. This reflection time came after I had been reading in the parables about Jesus healed the sick, and made Lazarus raise from the dead. I have been contemplating “why me” God. Why do I suffer? Why have I lost both parents at such a young age?How can I take one more overwhelming piece of terrible news?
In the study of these parables, I have realized that it isn’t just me. Martha ask Jesus, why. Martha asked Jesus in John 11:21, why us? Why didn’t you come when we called? Your friend, our brother has died.
Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. John 11:21 NIV
The Why Me of Suffering in Parables
This why me of suffering in parables continues in Mark 5:21-43 as you look at Jairus’ daughter. The synagogue leader shared his concern with Jesus for his daughters sickness. Jairus pled for Jesus to come and heal her by a tough of His hand. In the midst of this moment a woman with a 12 year issue of bleeding quietly pressed into the crowd. She knew enough of Jesus and His power to heal that just by touching the hem of His cloak this woman believed she would be healed. Jesus felt power leave Him and knew someone had believed enough to touch Him for healing. What did a young father, and a middle aged woman have in common? They had tremendous “why me” moments. These two could have said “why me” in my life of suffering, but instead they believed in Jesus for healing.
The Tremendous Self-deluded of Why Me of Suffering
Is mistaken in that it tricks us to believe that suffering is just about the “me”. I dare to say that each of us faces suffering of some kind throughout our lives. Many times people believe that if we become Christians and love God then we will live a happy and good life, and if we experience otherwise then we must be doing something wrong. In John 16:33, we are finding that Jesus in explaining how He will turn the disciples grief into joy. He shares these words of promise with the disciples.
33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33 NIV
We see in this promise that Jesus doesn’t promise a “prosperity” gospel, but a reality that we will have trouble or trials in this world. The hope comes in when He finishes the sentence by saying that He has entered the world to overcome it! Now that promise is one that should give us peace.
Hope Continues Through Disciples Testimony
Paul has shared with the church at Cornith, about his thorn in the flesh. (sounded like a Fibro flair to me?! Can I get an Amen!) He said that He had ask the Lord to remove it 3 times. God reminded Paul that “His grace was sufficient for him”. Paul stated that He delighted in his weakness and hardships. Why on earth would Paul say that? Paul says the most powerful thing-“For when I am weak, then I am strong.” In Paul’s weakness , he finds his strength in God.
Paul’s Strength in God Proven More
Paul shares in Philippians 3 that he has learned contentment in all circumstances. He has faced trials and learned that God is his source of strength. In the powerful testimony of Paul, we as experts in the Pity Party Parade can take note of Paul’s example.
11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
Our strength is in our weakness and our power is in Christ. Especially when we want to live in the tremendous, self-deluded “why me” moments of suffering, we look at Paul. We lean into the strength and power of God. It is when we are weak that we find our strength. It is in that weakness that we lean into God and know Him more.
No More Tremendous “Why Me” of Suffering
Today can we take a a moment to join Paul? Can we decide today that no more PPP, but we choose to find power in our weakness. Let us in the middle of the tremendous “why me’ moments lean into God. There are 5 Simple Truths to remember that our pain an suffering will draw us to Him. The tremendous why me of suffering can be a party that we stop hosting for ourselves. We must take time to daily look at the hope Christ offers in His Word. He wants us to draw into Him for our strength.